Creating Conscious Community Enlightened parenting by Angie Bailey "As the sun illuminates the moon and stars, so let us illumine one other." -- Anonymous Community is amazing. I have had friends through the years and have connected with many people who have been in my life for different reasons, but always I have valued their gifts and contributions to my existence. Since my husband and I brought children into our family, community has been more important to me than ever before. When I speak of community, I do not necessarily mean the immediate people who live in our neighborhoods (although that may be true as well). I'm talking more about conscious community. With whom do we choose to "hang with?" With whom do we share values, conversations and potluck meals? I strongly believe in the power of many. I want to tell you about my conscious community. Most have kids, and some do not. We enjoy very interesting conversations about spirituality, children, sex, food, music, books and everything else under the sun. We drink wine and laugh at incredibly crazy and silly stuff. These are the people that we have no problem leaving my children with when we need a break -- and we do the same for them. These are the people who are excited about coming to my new home for a house blessing ceremony and will bring their whole families to shine their loving lights for us all. These are the kids who play with my kids and talk together about their angels and special prayer rocks. I love these friends with all my heart. We support each other constantly through words, thoughts and action. Not only does our community offer fun and social times for our families, we adults get to demonstrate for the children the benefits of loving and supporting one another. My family would not be the same without them. Many of us have friends, but often feel too busy to arrange time to spend together. It's not about creating extravagant occasions to entertain. It's about opening up opportunities to share our lives with those we love. Why not have a rotating potluck dinner with your circle of friends. Each month, the families can meet at a different home. Maybe have themes for each dinner. Summer is an excellent time for barbeques and get-togethers, but any time can be special for gathering. Perhaps create seasonal celebrations with friends and involve the kids with crafts or baking for the holiday. At your gatherings, you may choose to have every family bring items for donation to a food shelf or the Humane Society. We sometimes forget the difference we make when we come together as a group. We need to begin to choose and plan consciously. Sometimes I simply invite a friend and her child over for a few hours. I do the daily routine of laundry, dishes and other exciting chores, but in the company and conversation of a friend. Meanwhile, my children are in community with their friend. Perhaps on one of these visits, we'll take a trip with the kids to a local nursing home to visit with the residents or go to the Humane Society and love on the kitties. I've come to discover it's all about that one word: conscious. Yes -- some days I will consciously stay in my sweats all day and will not take a shower. That's OK. Other days, I will consciously choose to create opportunities to bring children and myself into community. With each breath, each word and each action, we can choose to make a difference in the world around us. As adults, we get to model that for our children. How do we find a conscious community if we don't have one? I have connected with most of my friends through classes and workshops where we discovered we had similar interests. Many local publications, including this one, have calendars of classes and groups that meet regularly. Early Childhood Family Education offers playgroups for parents and young children (call the local chapter for a catalog of classes). I host a spiritual parenting group that meets twice a month. This is one of my main (and favorite) conscious communities, and anyone is welcome to join. The point is -- whether you have a community or not -- you have to choose to begin somewhere. Let it begin with you! Take action. Pick up the phone and invite a few families over for a potluck. Call and register for that class you've been meaning to take. Join a book club. Talk to people at your church or community center. Involve your family in a volunteer project. The opportunities for creating community are endless and the benefits are extraordinary. We will build stronger families by building stronger communities. What are you waiting for? Angie Bailey is director of Enlightened Parenting, a local organization dedicated to honoring the spirituality of children. She teaches workshops and writes on the topic of spiritual parenting. For more information about Enlightened Parenting and learn about upcoming events, please see www.enlightenedparenting.com or call (612) 581-7664. Copyright (c) 2002 Angie Bailey
March 2002